The Aftermath…

While the night of Tuesday, October 12, 2004, was a tough one for me, I was lifted up by the love I have from so many wonderful people in my life. On that night I was planning to sit through another night of my Foundations of the Profession of Social Work class, but boy how different that night turned out to be!

That night, I spoke on the phone to eleven different individuals, and only three of which did I call. In this order, I spoke with the following people: Becca Osborn, Laura Singleton, Holly Herr, Misty Willcox, Janaye Batiste, Hollie Inwood, Val Jolly, Cheryl Leland, Jennifer Ellison, Jayme Smith, and Jeremy Smith. If that wasn’t enough support from friends and family, I spoke on AIM that night with thirteen different folks, most of who IMed me: Brandi Jo Magee, Jennifer Walker, Melody Forest, Holly Herr, Meg Shareon, Becca Osborn, Laura Singleton, Aracely Velasquez, Misty Willcox, Jennifer Reiff, Liz Wood, Amanda Harris, and Chris Cummings. And by the next day the list continued. I can’t tell you how many people said to me the words, “you were the first person I thought of when I heard the news,” or “people were asking about you when they heard about it.” Can I just say I have AMAZING friends!

So, as the blessing of true friend’s continues, I’ve had many of you ask how am I doing in the days following the news, so I’ll tell you that now…

I’ll admit, I cried myself into a migraine that Tuesday night, but was able to relief it with Nyquil upon going to bed a little after midnight. With it being a school night, I had hopes of waking up the following morning at 7:45 AM free from the migraine, but that occurrence actually took place at 2:45 AM. HA! I found myself awake, headache free, and feeling very rested. Now, lying in bed, not being tired, only led to thinking, which led to me getting up to write the article I later submitted to the Optimist for publication; I finally went back to bed around 4:45 AM.

As for that article, it got published in Friday’s Optimist and I think it brought me a strong sense of closure in my typing and submitting it. I found myself rereading it in the paper on Friday feeling at ease. Some people say the funeral is a sense of closure, but for me, saying what I said in that article and in my signing of the tribute guestbook online worked the best for me.
The rest of the weekend in Abilene seems more like a time to honor Chucky instead of mourn his death, to me. I found myself sharing favorite moments and stories about Chucky with SEVERAL people all weekend. Those times of laughter are GREAT medicine!

Yeah, maybe my eating habits were greatly influenced this past week by this news, but let me tell you, it wasn’t but about an hour after the funeral that I found myself enjoying what has come to be one of my new FAVORITE places to eat when I go back to Abilene to visit, Rick and Carolyns! The lack of appetite could be contributed to basic nerves I suppose. I can’t tell you how worried I was about going to the visitation, which turned out to be NOTHING to worry about (he wasn’t even there), and then the funeral was more of a time of honor, rather than grieving, so it was not as rough as expected either. I had envisioned myself breaking down at the funeral, almost as I had done Tuesday night, but those who sat around me, can justify my claim that not once did I shed a tear, only had watery eyes on a few occasions. I might say I have nerves of steal, or maybe I just don’t like crying in front of people...HA, one obviously influenced me there! If anything, I found myself cracking up more often than having watery eyes while I was there. That man truly was a nut!

So, in the end, I’ll admit. I’ll still think of Chucky T and want to go visit him in his office for some encouraging words and advice every time I come to Abilene to visit. I also quite often find myself wishing I had taken advantage of the endless offers he gave me to come stay at his house with him and his wife whenever I was in the Abilene area. And don’t think I won’t be thinking of him when I write my paper for my graduate class that I was SOOO close to emailing him to ask him if I could write it on him only minutes before he apparently had his heart attack on Tuesday.

[If I haven’t already shared this with you, I’ll tell you now. Talk about weird, I have a paper I have to write for one of my classes and I had planned to interview and write it about him. So around about 3:45 PM that Tuesday I was reviewing the requirements for the paper and I only put off emailing him to ask if I could interview him this weekend or next for it, because Oprah was about to come on and I didn’t want to miss the show. How weird to think I was thinking of him only within the hour of his death and didn’t know it.]

I want to end by saying thanks to all of you who gave me support when I so greatly needed it! And I’ll end now with the lyrics to a song that I listened too on the trip back from Abilene today. I think they kind of fit with the events of the past week.

Good Riddance (Time Of Your Life)
By: Green Day

Another turning point a fork stuck in the road
Time grabs you by the wrist directs you where to go
So make the best of this test and don't ask why
It's not a question but a lesson learned in time

It's something unpredictable
But in the end is right
I hope you had the time of your life

So take the photographs and still frames in your mind
Hang it on a shelf in good health and good time
Tattoos of memories and dead skin on trial
For what it's worth it was worth all the while

It's something unpredictable
But in the end is right
I hope you had the time of your life

It's something unpredictable
But in the end is right
I hope you had the time of your life

It's something unpredictable
But in the end is right
I hope you had the time of your life