Sunday, January 02, 2005



You know, I think people who just love to ponder thoughts and think about things, they are bound to fall victim to being filled with many of their own theories on life. I have so many theories on things it isn’t funny. Yes, I have some theories that many consider outrageous, but I still think they could have some sense of merit. Let me give you one that I too laugh at when I tell it, but the more I think about it, the more I’d love to do a study on it, seriously!

Okay…I like to refer to this one as the “Jenni Kripner takes out her frustrations on her vegetables” theory. HA! Nice, huh? ;) And yes, Jenni is fully aware of this theory. She enjoys a good laugh from it too. Let me explain it….

Okay, Jenni Kripner is one of those people I would have to describe as someone who never seems to get mad. I can’t recall seeing her upset with someone or yelling or taking out frustrations on anyone or about anything. She is just one of those laid back, cool-calm-and-collected type of gals. You can’t help but love her!

Well, something that I ALWAYS tease Jenni about is her dislike for most vegetables. She is a rather picky eater, but especially doesn’t like most (no, Jenni, I didn’t say “all,” just “most”) vegetables.

Well, as a person that studies human behaviors and loves that kind of stuff, I was determined to explain how Jenni relieves built up frustrations, because all humans become frustrated from time to time, and it must be released somehow.

This was when my idea of linking the two—frustrations and vegetables—came along. My theory is that Jenni takes out her frustrations in life on vegetables! Being a person who couldn’t hurt a fly, she has to take it out on something non-human, so the vegetables won out. She takes it out on her vegetables and refuses to eat them!

I would LOVE to do a study to see if there is any sort of link between people who are picky eaters and people who are “laidback” and don’t seem to take out anger/aggression/frustrations on people. Wouldn’t that be cool?!!? HA!

So, besides my “outrageous” theories, believe it or not, I have some theories that I think are more “believable” I suppose you might say.

Here is one I came up with while taking a shower tonight.

So, it’s obvious that I’m not involved in a relationship with a guy right now. Nor have I been for a while. HA! So besides the obvious, it is time to address the not so obvious. Why is this?

Many of you might be thinking what I’m about to address first, and yes, don’t think I’m not aware of it. HA!

American society looks for romantic relationships in the beginning on a physical attraction level first off. Admit it. Seriously. As much as we all might want to say, “No, physical features aren’t important to me,” we all seem to be societal-ly programmed to notice “good looks” in a person. For example, you can’t say you don’t notice a hot guy (or girl) when around and about. How many times do you catch yourself saying to a friend, “So and so is HOT!” or “Look over there, he’s HOT!” We all fall victim to it. And don’t think that if the situation arose that that “HOT” person suddenly came up to you and wanted to be in a romantic relationship with you right then and there that you would say “no”…..riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiight! (assuming you are single at the time, of course).

So if physical attraction seems to have this dominance in our society, I must take this into consideration. So…I have don’t worry. ;)

Personally, I’ve never considered myself “attractive,” and quite honestly, I think it is pretty evident that I don’t try too hard to come off “attractive.” HA! I have no problem differing from the norms. I love my baggy jeans and big t-shirts. I am a girl who wears a baseball cap 24/7. I don’t seem to take interest in make-up, hair care products, or fashion tips. I am too stubborn to suck it up and take a pill to cure acne. I wear glasses because I don’t have the patience to stick with contacts since the one time I tried them and it took me an hour to get them in and an hour to get them out. And so on and so on…

[You know, if you have never seen me before, and you just read that, you’re probably thinking, “Gosh, she must be Quasimodo.” HA! HA!]


So I thought, you know, maybe it is just because I’m not “attractive” physically. But then I thought, you know, romantic relationships aren’t only based on physical attractiveness. And you know, their basis can’t be TOTALLY different from the basis of other relationships, such as friendships. So I thought, “Well, how is it that I have so many friendships?”

Let’s face it; I’ve been blessed with many great friendships. I’ve been blessed with more friends than a person could ask for, and I’m so thankful for each and everyone! Of course, most all these friendships are with females (which brings up a whole different theory I have for that, but I relate it to the idea that I think guys base a lot on physical appearance, not just romantic relationships, but friendships as well). Anyways…

Why is it that I think I have so many friendships, but lack romantic relationships? I think the theory that explains this is the theory that explains my earlier question “why is this?”

My theory is based on the fact of the kind of person I am. I am the type of person that it takes a while to get to know, and actually to even get to like. I think most all my closest friendships were developed over a lot of time. Now I’m sure you’re all thinking, “well duh,” but even my not so close, but still friendships none the less, these friends did not immediately “fall in love with Kim Smith.”

While this might sound arrogant (but I don’t mean it that way, I’m just trying to find words to explain myself), I think I am the kind of person that "grows on people." I have always considered one of my most likeable characteristics to be my sense of humor (feel free to correct me if you think differently). But with my sense of humor, it usually has to grow on people. But even more importantly, for this theory especially, I don’t normally bring out my sense of humor immediately when I meet people, especially when I am not totally comfortable around someone yet. This is very evident when I’m with people that are older than I or even when I’m with a lot of guys. It takes me a lot longer to become comfortable in these situations and open up enough to let my humor out.

I’ll never forget when I started being comfortable enough around my aunt and uncle that I currently live with that I started saying my jokes out-loud when they were both around instead of just saying them under my breath where just the kiddos could hear me. Nowadays we can all be in the car, or sitting around eating in the kitchen together and I’ll crack a joke and my and aunt and uncle (along with all the kiddos of course) will crack up. What can I say, it’s a gift! ;) My aunt and her kids think I’m one of the funniest people in the world. She is always like, “you are just sooo funny!” HA!

Sooo…my theory is this…

I think since guys tend to fall victim to the “attractiveness” problem that our society has, they don’t give a person like myself enough time to "shine through and win them over." HA! Yeah, I know putting it that way sounds funny, but honestly, I think it is true. If I looked like a model and was able to draw a guy in like that first, THEN let them get to know my personality, I’d be fine with the fellas, but, since this isn’t the case, it’s a little harder for folks like myself.

So, overall, does this bother me? Not really. I mean, it can become frustrating sometimes. Sometimes I find myself thinking, “Dude, you’re 23! You need to get a man.” But obviously it doesn’t bother me enough that I am changing myself to become more societal-ly “attractive.” HA! Let's just say the day you see me give up the ball cap for any reason other than professional, you’ll know I care! ;)

No comments: